I’ve been doing lots of open mics. I did one recently at a Chinatown beauty shop. It’s called the Peek-a-Boo Hair Salon.

It’s very Chinese.

They got glowing red lanterns dangling from the ceiling. A big laughing Buddha with a fat stone belly. Plus, a Great Wall… of two-way mirrors.

(Talk about a captive audience.)

I went up after the Tik Tok Twins, a teenage Taiwanese dance act. I opened with my bit about Pork-Fried Firecrackers.

Nothing! Not a giggle, not a smirk. You could’ve heard an egg drop.

At first, I thought they didn’t understand me. But then one woman started clapping. But she was only drying her nails.

Next, I did my gag about Dim Sum being the name of my neighbor’s idiot kid. I thought I heard a snicker after that. Just a big toe getting clipped.

Then, I got a bit edgy. I did my joke about President Trump and President Xi meeting at a Castro bath house — how they both blew a shot at world peace.

[As Trump]: “Shame, shame, Xi, Xi. Look at what a mess we made!”

That joke made the Buddha blush. The two-way mirrors got hella steamy.

In the end, I did get a standing ovation — from a lady getting up from the hair dryer.